They call me Mr Guilty

I am guilty of not blogging.

They call me Mr Guilty
Mr. Guilty that's my name
I'm the one
The no good bum
I am the one to blame.

I am so guilty,
I am as guilty as can be
I am so sorry
This is my apology......

If any of you are old enough to know Loudon Wainwright, that's one of his songs, one I memorized because it fits the Christian mindset so well.

Why have I been a slacker? Sing with me: I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike, I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it where I like. Bicycle! Bicycle! Brriiing, brrriiing. That's a Queen song, by the way.

All good songs are about cycling and guilt. I feel guilty if I don't train. I feel guilty if I train and don't blog. I feel guilty when I ride or race on Sunday. I feel guilty when I go to church and miss the races.

So how am I doing in the races? How kind of you to ask! Placed 2nd in a criterium (fast, twisty turn race) and 2nd in a road race the past couple of weeks. Getting ready for a big Provincial road race next Sunday, hope the guilt of missing church does not hold me back. The hills are getting easier and the body has stopped telling me it is dying. One should never sit on their ass all winter and not train.

That's it, I have now blogged and the guilt is gone. It's all about performance. You now love me again. See you soon.

Go Oilers,
Pa

Mr Rejection

Part of the excitement of being in leadership is dealing with the people you are leading. Last night I had a go around with Mr. Rejection Syndrome, a bitter root, I have learned, that defiles many.

I really wonder why these people, who are rejected by everyone, keep coming back. When I tell someone they don't matter and don't count you'd think they'd get the drift. When I refuse to communicate with them and make sure I'm unavialable you'd think they'd give up. I don't know what more I can do to let them know they aren't wanted and nobody likes them.

Every rejection event is well catalouged in their minds, the list stretching back for at least a year. Every inclusion event is conveniently erased. I find they are full of new information too, such as the fact that an email contact does not count as a real contact. The phone still rates but in person appearances conquer all.

The interesting thing about Mr Rejection was that we found out it was his birthday (he wasn't telling because we are supposed to know these things and would if we cared at all) and had a little birthday party for him. He said he hadn't blown out candles since he was 9 years old.

But don't let the party fool you, we don't like him. We wish he'd go away. If he did no one would call him or care.

I'm glad for blogs. I don't have to be Mr Nice Guy, I can just rant away and know people can read it and think what they want. Despite my rant I do understand rejection syndrome and know how to work with it. There is nothing more common in the body of Christ and every leader better be prepared to deal with it.

And, get this, I love Mr Rejection and I don't really care what he says about me and the Body, we will assimilate him in the end. Love conquers all.

Pa

Life

Having someone in our Kinship group go through a miscarriage lately I felt the burden that came upon her during and after the painful event. As Job said, that which she feared came upon her and that which she dreaded happened to her. As Job asked, why show the light to people living in misery? Why speak of the greatness of God to people whose normal, happy lives have become an intolerable burden?

There is much pain to bear at times in our lives when things go badly wrong. We know it's not supposed to happen like this, yet it does and it can seem like life is out of control. I see this as a sort of rythym of life, up and down, happy and sad, joy and pain. I don't think it's the proper rythym but it's what I see. I also don't think we have to go with the ups and downs, there is a possibility of sleeping peacefully through the storms.

It is apparent to me that the burdens and pain of life can easily erase the goodness and joy of life if we let them. Every person, believer in God or not, has an incredible resistance to buckling under the pain of life and survival depends on not getting swept under the waves.

One of the reasons God puts us in groups is so we can hold each other afloat. When intolerable pain hits us we need someone to come and hold our heads above the water because we are on that thin edge of admitting it would be easier just to sink. At least the pain would end. But together we get through the pain and move on. In the incredible economy of God the pain is redeemed and life breaks forth again.

If you are in pain today I assure you that God cares and is doing something about it. Christ, who intercedes before His throne, is praying for you and he has instructed his angels concerning you. Even now they are rousing people to pray, to call, to care. God is not far off and his arm is not too short to save.

Pa

Sweet ride

Well, I survived the race last night. Rode quite well but had nothing left for the sprint, which means I should have done some training in the winter. My bike is incredible, surges on the hills are easy to follow and it corners like an F1 race car. Well worth the price of my last born...........or maybe you didn't know I had to sell Kayle into slavery in order to buy it. I figured since Kayle was a slave anyway he wouldn't mind.

Now that I wrote that I feel like I shouldn't make it sound like I paid some dear price for this bike. The truth is God served up the money with no effort on my part and I didn't have to pinch pennies, sell anything or anyone or dig into savings. I need to declare that this was a gift from Him, not through anything I did. Thank you Father.

Pa

Still ridin'

Wow, that was a long bike ride. Just got back now and am able to blog again. In the contest between blogging time and riding time you know who loses.

My new bike is fairer than ten thousand and we will find out tonight how fast she is because it's my first race. I've increased my racing a bit this year and plan on doing the Provincial road races as well as local club races, something that will put me to the test. The first Provincial race is a couple of weeks away and is a 3 stage race over two days, a real test for an old-timer. Old fossils normally get stuck in Category 5, the beginners category, where they are out of the way and won't get run over by all the young gearheads. But due to the fact that I have raced a bit I was put in Category 4 where the gearheads let old buzzards do all the work then spit them out the back of the pack when the race really starts, never to care about them again.

I do have a plan though. Quite a number of my team members ride in Cat 4, some of whom are young gearheads. Our coach also rides Cat 4. With a team in a race you can do a lot of things and everyone gets to play a part. I plan on being part of the exciting drama of team racing and making sure the young'uns get to the finish on time (i.e. 1st).

Ma said she was going to pick up the blogging slack but she's off greenhouse hopping today and once she gets her hands in the dirt look out - you won't hear from her except on rainy days.

We had a neat experience at Kinship last night, Kayle brought home a dvd of a church service and we listened to the worship segment with Suzy Wills. The Spirit hit our group very deeply and many of us made a course correction to get back in the flow of the Spirit. For me it was profound and deep and I realized that the Lord has always called me to follow the Spirit in our group, no matter what it looks like or what people think. When I lead in the Spirit there is life, when I lead on my own it's just another meeting.

We had a deep time of ministry over one another, laying hands on each other and saying only, "Come Holy Spirit". May everything I do be worship to Him.

Pa